Saje je sebenarnya.. on Friday afternoon like this melayan blog.. :) All my office mates are away.. masing - masing ada agenda masing - masing memandangkan semalam gaji :D These few weeks banyak sangat yang bermain inside my head ni.. I really think of making changes of myself.. get myself motivated. Ingat tak dulu - dulu lagu "stay the same"
Don't you ever wish
You were someone else
You were mean to be
The way you are exactly
Don't you ever say
You don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself
You better off by far
Lebih kurang camni la lagu die.. kite nih tak patut wish kite somone else sebab we were born as uniquely as we can be.. tapi, we have to love ourselves kan. So it means give ourselves the best.. So, perlu jugak ade changes for goods.
Sebenarnya up until today I'm still striving to figure out something I'm so passionate about.. Wish would be my additional advantages.. A good quality. Sama ada, saya tak jumpa atau saya tak nampak. Ump...
But it doesn't mean that I don't like what I'm doing now.. saya suka dan saya masih belajar. Masih cuba untuk lebih mahir.. And these days things coming from every direction.. Works, Wedding, My parents request, My friend request of help, which make me do hope for that I maybe should have more than 24 hours a day :D well, I know it's about management and elimination of stress tapi.. saying always easier than performing.. even though action should speak louder than words..
Well, maybe the first step is getting it out of my head before re- arrangement :D then a re-schedulling.. sungguh.. kadang - kadang we got this target inside our head.. for like a time frame yang sometimes seems illogical to human body.. :D sekurang - kurang nya luahan kind of help me sort my mind a bit..
That would be a short term goals stress.. macam mane yang long term pulak. I know life shouldn't be monetary oriented sangat but money is as well needed untuk kelancaran perjalanan hidup kita. Well, sometimes susah jugak bila Mama says something like she wants to see me as PTD, posting banyak all over jabatan means.. higher chances untuk naik position.. which everyone tahu is not as that easier.. ( well, I fully understood that mama works in government for a long time so she thinks that the best post that I should try to be one like). And abah on the other hand thinks that Lecturing is the best one since it involves the same gate as currently.. just a change of scheme.. (and lecturer memang takyah tunggu kekosongan jawatan gred atas untuk naik.. an open post) but to teach means to be specialist.. master and experience should be in allign.. Yes, I'll do my master soon.. It's in my life target but experience is not something you can buy.. So, what I want for myself exactly? What my long term goal..
I envy those people yang have courage to jump into bussiness industry.. Ajaran agama pon kata the best job is bussiness.. But yang sangat tak ada experience.. yang sangat takut.. yang tak ada modal.. well, these first step pon make you berfikir jugak.. jadi government servant memang seems easier in term of security.. but If we want to see ourselves meningkat from one point to another.. memang tak mudah kan.. but if we join biz industry, memang kita boleh tengok macam mane kita punya improvement.. takan selamanya kita di takuk yang sama... :( teringin jugak nak merasa ada rumah cantik, kereta yang selesa, melancong ke eropah.. pergi umrah tiap - tiap tahun.. but nak bussiness pon kena ada kemahiran.. knowledge on the thing yang kita nak buat.. I got knowledge sikit - sikit in term of construction industry but.. I don't think construction is really an industry yang senang.. Ump.. choice bidang pon penting..
Well, maybe slowly, I can begin to sort my short term goal.. at least by tahun depan.. tenang sikit.. :) wedding selesai.. SKT pon done with flying colors.. dan dalam tenang.. mungkin kita jumpa sesuatu yang baru.. idea yang baru.. inisiatif yang baru.. we don't know.. Then long term goal pon jadi lebih mudah... well, monetary or not.. yang penting ketenangan dalam hidup.. balancing yang obviously, the hardest thing in life..